im missing magic am i

So here is the sun outside of the bloody window

And the sun and xxx is looking at me

I like my life here

In this planet

I mean

Planet earth

I m now in the sky with diamonds

Its  a little bit

Mm

Mmm like a laid out flame with water underneath and a sebra sky on the background

Yesyes

A zebra sky no more

Like xxx

He likes it when I take the piss out of him that s nice

Hes surprised and happily entairtained

Like today

He smiled when I told him that 15 years ago he was just a child and did he play the child

He smiled and stayed smiling with that beautiful smile that basically could have been a laugh

#but

I like it when he laughs

I saw him laughing once when I said classic and he said classic

And his teeth and colours

Its ridiculus

Equally ridiculus to the sky above

Matches the sky above

And the man made land below is like his chest

Man honestly

I ve shagged and shagged and seen men naked

But when he took his shirt off

I remember I gasped quietly and stopped breathing

And u know I can zoom in and stuff

But this

Nothing ever prepared me for this and I couldn’t get enough

I m still ungry

It’s a combination of hungry and angry

I don’t wanna spoil the text but

Maybe its for the best???

#for the best?

How can missing this be for the best

I mean

Russel brands career all right but

Did u see I m not sure would I ever be satisfied would I ever stop

I mean why settle and why not settle

This life

This bet with god

What u wanna do

Innit

I decided I wowed to save the world

I did it

I did it quietly like a silent fart

But

The truth is

I belong and it s my call and I wanna work towards it

I m not saying I ll do it and I m not saying it matters

But I ll give it a fair go

Fair is a bit brave but I d like to say it to give the attention it deserves

Now xxx

Yes I could scream and cream and when he said are u sure u r leaving

I didn t know what to think

And later I thought he was projecting

And maybe he didn’t want me to leave

He s sensitive

How could he super fuck it up last nite

How

I mean what can I say???

Did he not know I fancy him did he not fancy that girl did he go out with her because is it his friend or fuckin flatmate

Or what