he doesnt know

He doesn’t no that he s hurting me

Does he

Is he hurting me

Is it an ego boost or an ego trip or an ego hypotheses

He said I talk so much shit

I love him for that

I love him for sucking my clit

For hours

The last thing I remember is that he had the whole thing in his mouth

Like completely and utterly

I mean

Ah

Ah maybe he s got some pleasure to give

Elsewhere

Maybe

Maybe I need to get a grip get it together completely disinfect it disengage

And realize

There s no tomoro

Today

I ll send him a message

I ll check my voicemail

And my email

I ll try find the two stupid books that I fuckin need yet I cant find them

They are here

In my stupid bookshelf thing

What s the fuckin point if you can t access them when u need them

What s the fuckin point if you have a book in ur library and u can t read it when u want to

What s the fuckin point of having a boyfriend if you can t fuck them when u need to

Need

Is the word in action

Need

I ll have to check my email and why action is highlighted

So marks says that he needs to fuck off for a bit after coming close

That s what they do

Apparently men and dogs

And I forgot about that point

And I breached the promise

And I tried to use my vagina to get his attention

Am I fired for that

But he doesn’t strike me as an independent prat

He s from esex

I could be wrong

The nails on the windon suggested otherwise

They were just there to remind me

He doesn’t even hide

I don’t think he d hide if I said something like do these belong to another lover

He d probably say yes

Or no

Or maybe

Or I don’t know

Or no

There s only so much u can say about a boots leopard tarty nail for fuck s sake

Did u find it in ur asshole

Is it middleclass

It has essex allover it

Cover it

I ll swallow it

We should never have died

Or be born

In essex

What about essex

Why do I like essex boys

They r boys

That s why

They r boys made in essex

It s greater London

It s great

Longon

I don’t fuckin know

Maybe I don’t like boys from essex

Maybe they like me

Cos I m hot and exotic and Italian European

I m greek

I m Greece

Ha

Eitherway they ll have me any time of the day

But I suppose I m also a bit too greek when it comes to drama

Emotions

Emotional details

Attachments

I m a bit scary

Do I view myself as a bit scary

I m a bit non significant

Lets face it babe

I have that look

It s all right

Maybe they r just proud

May be in the end they know we wont get along

I could n t drag my kids for that matter

I couldn’t therefore have sex with a doctor

In the possibility – the real possibility- of getting pregnant

I see them as more powerful than me in society

I m an artist and there s no tomoro

And even the guy from harrods couldn’t fight the kgb

I mean let s face it

We r fucked

But are we really talking about that

What else

Lighten up

So u couldn’t be with that guy

That s what u r saying

But u could fuck him nevertheless and let him suck your clit

Yes yes

Okei

Aha

Do u think he knows that

He knows to you he s just a fuck

And he couldn’t deal with the rejection

Maybe he wants to be your boyfriend

Maybe he wants you to be his girlfriend

But the thing is

You are too different

He believes in drugs and he takes a paracetamol a day

And you don’t like that

It s talking power

What is there to like

Okei

Do u want to change the approach

So it s not just a fuck then

I wanna be your girlfriend

I wanna shit in your pot

Isn’t that what girlfriends do

Like there s no tomoro

I mean

Atm

I offered it for your birthday

Like there s no tomoro

When was it

16 june

And now we have 18 july

It s all right actually

Maybe he was protecting myself himself and us

Maybe he needed some time alone

Maybe he couldn’t deal with having a girlfriend at this time

Maybe the fuckin bra s friend wears a bra

Maybe

Like there s no tomoro

Why does life have to be so complicated

I need my cum supply

Doctor

Where the fuck is it

Who s getting it

You said you ll make me new everyhalf an hour

You also said you should give me keys

To this house

Your house

You say these things and I don’t know what you want from me

And then I say something like

And you ll find me here- in the swastika pose

And you said no or something

What do u want

An omelette?

Do u love me doctor

Is that what you want

We all want that

For fucks sake

What is going on

I m being cool at the moment

Like there s no tomoro

I mean

Today

Yes

Does he want to see me

Is it important/

Do I want to see him

Is the question

Well I m a bit tired

I ll go for a swim

Chill round my house

Pack my bag and see me out by nine o clock

It s now eleven

Nine eleven

Natasha and alex weren t always together

But since they r apart]

Together

It seems like she s doing things she always has

She s nice and she could help me

I would love that

Wouldn’t i

Let s see

Like ther s no tomoro

Today

x

I want that kiss to be small

18 7 14

We r push and pull

We r trying to figure each other out

We r non assertive

It s difficult

But he gave me such a look when I challenged him for not calling me

Like a million tonnes

Like who ever gave me such a look

So sexy also to be able to do that

Exercise this authority at a naked child

Wow

I mean

Excellant

Like a tiny rabbit

you said ur on your twenty eight year

and your twenty seven birthday was on the 16 th of june 2014

so let s find you

2014- 27= 1987

Egsactly the opposite so 1987=20 2007, plus 7, 2014 yey

You are such a fuckin rubbit rubbit

I love my rabit

He doesn’t know but all I could think about is a rabbit

A rabi

Is he also jewish

Am I thinking of adopting him

He s a man

I said the younger the better and he said watch it

And then I explained it tho in terms of politics

I gave him my piece of mind

And he said something about arguing

That I m hard to argue with

Well

That said

I m a good fuck

I love him

I ll check what he says

Rabbit x

Meaw