how

just how
do i disable the bullshit from pooping up\
literally
do i stop listening
do i stop caring
i gave xxx some shit some well spent shit i m kinda saving for a special occasion
i m sorry
i feel guilty now
on top of everything
i needed to create a drama
i could be with more interesting people
i dont know
do i unnerve everyone
i m not bothered
i m not fussed
no body really understands what i m going through
what do u recon
is gonna happen
like there s no tomoro
today
what do u think is gonna happen
nothing mate
nothing absolutely nothing
no thing
not a thing
nothing
nothing
i have five days to live
leave
it s been the same with hollywood
it s been the same with everything
i ll kiss ass
i ll suck cock
these things dont exist
as options
in a million years
my parents dont know
dont understand
i can borrow six hundred pounds for the rent and i can still not have enough
that s the truth
that s the spirit
it s the true spirit
i mean for real
i dont understand
how is anyone supposed to live
in order to survive
it s the money
is it the money
is it the consciousness
a different set of friends\
of adventures
of knowingness
of quality of life
of life
a different set of life
and lies and what lies within
i m sorry i m so sad
i m glad russel brand isnt comin here tonite
i m fuckin sorry
it s not for me
nothing is
for me
knowingly
i m not sad
i m just upset
i told xxx off
i had no right
of no tomoro
today
i m just upset
i m upset
but i can look somewhere else and be fine
i can sell my machine i ll be fine
fine
i wish i had things to sell
kidneys
books
whatever\
i m angry at my parents
i m angry at my uncle
i m angry at myself
i m angry god sent xxx
but then xxx wouldn t have wanted to spend 500 pounds in five days for me tho
cos everyone s trying to make money of me
cos i can take it
cos i dont need it
cos i m a fairy
i m superficial
i have no real needs
in order to survive
like everybody else
cos i m not everybody else
init
i am me
and in order to me
to be me
to stay with me
me
me needs to be done
certain things
certain me s
mees
like i need to change lap tops
or save this one
yes let s go for save this one
like go to homerton and ask here see my laptop
is crazy
in order to survive
it has to kill me
like me
a bit of a drama day anyway
not needed
not neccessairy
i - as we heard me sayin in the past- will need an assertiveness course
what do u recon is gonna happen
i m gonna start asking
around
like there s no tomoro
today
like
what do u think is gonna happen
er?
dunno
this isnt about xxx
this is about xxx
i d still be here
alone
survive
it doesnt need to be like that
dear old life
it needs to be happy
anyway
i should go and see russel brand
again
what do u recon
and in the end of the day
why not
what else do i have to do
this boy got a one less leg cos of a bike accident
so me
i ll go check out russel brands tickets
why not
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