i m married to death

i m married to forever ness




so secretary was my idea of romance
once again
the girls got the balls
u change continent u fly away
whatever happens
doesnt matter
it was a step too far
i went to la
i could have gone to jail ey
i could have turned up in a wedding cake
the thing is
the difference between u and me
she had balls
she had seen the vulnerability
and i had seen the back of it
i had seen the getting over me
she had seen the suffering
i had seen the piece of the suffering
i wouldnt have known
what suffering i could have caused
she loved him
she thought she had the solution
i didnt
he told me i got dad issues
he had seen red
i couldnt help him
i could have proposed with a dress
long story short
maybe i am made for russel brand
it was typing of]
of
what s he made of
shit
megastone
luis ck
he s a great writer
hes a poet
he was all there with his spoken word bit
he would terribly put me off
he s so sensitive
but
butt
he loves me
he doesnt know it
yet
he kinda did there for a second
but he hasnt emailed me
so what does he say
hi i m russel brand
u told me to email you
you ordered me
well
what can i say
take me out on a date
somewhere nice
quick
and quick
do u say that
i could say it again the next time
i could say
we dont have to talk
u can take heroin
that s not funny
fukky
fuckyin funny
anyway
i almost proposed to xxx
i guess i can ask russel out
i mean
what s the difference
what s the fuckin difference
u know what u know
so what is a narcissist
i dont think he is
he has a lot of empathy
and he s very sensitive
why the fuck does he bang on about the narcissistic personality
hes lovely he is
he s troubled
and as he said
his life ]
lends itself to frustration
alienation
ation
intonation
hesitation
psychological profiling
what do u do with a girl that thinks she s getting a porsh
and she is
cos she is
cos she fuckin said so
init
1 st of august
what else do u wanna know
it smells of fart
what do u do
i m happy
i m light
i m airy
i saw me yesturday and it reflected all that
today i watched suicide
cheered me up
haha
what else happened
hackney
hackney happened
streets of hollywood
burst down in tears
flames
i dont like the word flame
what it does to the sound
sounds like floky
u can say fire
i suppose
candle
stick
yellow
piss
associaton
beer
what s association spelled likeinit
the music from the secretry reminds me i have no balls
no crazy falls
i didnt ask
i didnt get
nearly
not nearly enough
can we go through that again
really
nearly
he said
i said
but i wasnt there
i went there
let s just focus on that
ford focus
is for the norm
i m gettin a porsh
an out of here
in my head
hollywood is a mechanism
a slow mechanism
who cares
and who gives a shit
i wanna do comedy
co me dy
and if you think
mediocre aftistan
u ll put me low
put me down
set me on fire
u think again\
cos that s where the mind stops
right there
i m psychosis
i m filotimo
im winning
and u know
i m breakin the porsh
and i m picking russel on
and he ll be fine
and he ll be on fire
i ll google his friend mat
now
yep it was him
xx
1st of august
as i said